Monday, September 27, 2010
April 8, 2010
I ordered Graviola and Obijwa (Cassie) Tea capsules today. The Maitake mushroom blend is on its way from Mom. I found a bow tie and a girlie ascot and brown velvet jacket at thrift stores today. I still need some form of vest for J.
Thursday, September 9, 2010
April 7, 2010, part 2
Mom is sending me Maitake mushroom caplets, I'm also ordering Graviola from the amazon and buying Cassie's tea next week.
I'm holding firmly to my belief that God gave us the right plants to help our bodies heal. My faith is not in the herbs, but in God's provision to Adam, Noah, etc. God gave us all we needed. HE is the Great Physician!
I have an appointment with Dr. P, the chemotherapist, on Monday, 4/12; then another appointment with Dr. H for a pelvic exam. Yea! :( Then another CT scan. Double yea :( . I think I can deal. Needles aren't that bad. There are worse things, like major abdominal surgery.
BTW! DS is doing a photo shoot for our family at S----- Park on Saturday. He does free pics for cancer patients. We're doing Alice in Wonderland pics and straight up family pics. I'm so excited.
I've got almost everything together for it: costumes, mismatched teacups, even a hookah! KP and JB really came through for me: teacups, teapots, tablecloths, etc.
I have lingering pain in my right pelvic-hip area, and I'm unable to lift my left knee much more than normal walking height.
I'm holding firmly to my belief that God gave us the right plants to help our bodies heal. My faith is not in the herbs, but in God's provision to Adam, Noah, etc. God gave us all we needed. HE is the Great Physician!
I have an appointment with Dr. P, the chemotherapist, on Monday, 4/12; then another appointment with Dr. H for a pelvic exam. Yea! :( Then another CT scan. Double yea :( . I think I can deal. Needles aren't that bad. There are worse things, like major abdominal surgery.
BTW! DS is doing a photo shoot for our family at S----- Park on Saturday. He does free pics for cancer patients. We're doing Alice in Wonderland pics and straight up family pics. I'm so excited.
I've got almost everything together for it: costumes, mismatched teacups, even a hookah! KP and JB really came through for me: teacups, teapots, tablecloths, etc.
I have lingering pain in my right pelvic-hip area, and I'm unable to lift my left knee much more than normal walking height.
Saturday, September 4, 2010
April 7, 2010, part 1
We saw Dr. H, oh, one day before Mom went home. Here's what we're looking at:
5 weeks / 5 days a week external radiation
5 weeks / 1 day a week internal radiation
The internal radiation requires twilight sedation by IV. :{
However, it is only 5 times.
Dr. H implied that I would by receiving 7 doses / 1 per week of chemotherapy in conjunction with my radiation. I cried after the appointment.
So now I have numbers running through my head. 25-7-5, 25-7-5, 25-7-5.
Doable numbers.
I had dinner with SM and her parents on Monday night. S's mom has been treated for ovarian cancer for 2 years. Chemo only. She said she'll probably be on chemo for the rest of her life. It breaks my heart, but it also scared me.
5 weeks / 5 days a week external radiation
5 weeks / 1 day a week internal radiation
The internal radiation requires twilight sedation by IV. :{
However, it is only 5 times.
Dr. H implied that I would by receiving 7 doses / 1 per week of chemotherapy in conjunction with my radiation. I cried after the appointment.
So now I have numbers running through my head. 25-7-5, 25-7-5, 25-7-5.
Doable numbers.
I had dinner with SM and her parents on Monday night. S's mom has been treated for ovarian cancer for 2 years. Chemo only. She said she'll probably be on chemo for the rest of her life. It breaks my heart, but it also scared me.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
March 29, 2010
Dr. T called this morning. The one lymph node they tested during surgery was positive. We knew that. All other lymph nodes and my ovary came back negative!
Thank you, God! Such a relief.
On Saturday, SM, EP, JR, Midge and Mom came over for my birthday party. SM brought shepherd's pie and butterbeer, decorations and art supplies. EP brought trifle.
It just ends there, but we had a great time together. Food, movie, painting, gifts - it was good to have some girl-time after being in the hospital and feeling really lousy.
Thank you, God! Such a relief.
On Saturday, SM, EP, JR, Midge and Mom came over for my birthday party. SM brought shepherd's pie and butterbeer, decorations and art supplies. EP brought trifle.
It just ends there, but we had a great time together. Food, movie, painting, gifts - it was good to have some girl-time after being in the hospital and feeling really lousy.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
March 26, 2010
On the phone... waiting, waiting. I really need some direct numbers.
So, someone will call me back...
On Monday. :(
So, someone will call me back...
On Monday. :(
Monday, August 30, 2010
March 25, 2010
I shall not die, but live, and declare the works of the Lord.
Psalm 118:17
I haven't gotten my pathology results back and I'm freaking out. They said it would take a week and it's been exactly a week. Every time I have some test result that I'm waiting for... well, I just haven't gotten any good test results lately.
For whatever reason, an envelope on which I had written Dr. M's office address has disappeared and I had some security blanket thing tied to it. So I kind of went a little crazy trying to find it. It didn't even have her number on it. Now I'm waiting for mom because I need to apologize.
I think my pain meds affect my emotions - as in, I don't have any.
I just have moments of getting frantic about something.
Psalm 118:17
I haven't gotten my pathology results back and I'm freaking out. They said it would take a week and it's been exactly a week. Every time I have some test result that I'm waiting for... well, I just haven't gotten any good test results lately.
For whatever reason, an envelope on which I had written Dr. M's office address has disappeared and I had some security blanket thing tied to it. So I kind of went a little crazy trying to find it. It didn't even have her number on it. Now I'm waiting for mom because I need to apologize.
I think my pain meds affect my emotions - as in, I don't have any.
I just have moments of getting frantic about something.
Friday, August 27, 2010
March 23, 2010
Beloved, think it not strange concerning the fiery trial which is to try you, as though some strange thing happened unto you:
But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings; that when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.
I Peter 4:12-13
So I've skipped some things. Last week, we were in G'ville almost every day.
I went to my consultation with Dr. M on March 12. She was very confident and factual and I felt comfortable with her as my surgeon. We scheduled my surgery for March 18. We went back Tuesday for lab work and a CT scan. I had to drink 32 oz of Gatorade laced with iodine over 1 1/2 hours. Then I had to have an IV. :( They passed me through a donut and the contrast was weird and hot, like sitting on leather interior in the summer. The tech told me I would feel like I had wet myself. {great}
I wish we hadn't gone out for dinner. I woke up very ill at 3 am. I finally threw up at 4:30 and was able to get a little sleep.
Wednesday was my pre-op appointment and also clear liquids day. More lab work. Most of my day was spent in the bathroom. :|
Thursday we got to S----- at 8:30 am. I got called in to anesthesia to get set up. Oxygen, IV, O2 sensor, tummy block. They put me out to give me shots in the stomach.
I barely remember going into surgery - just bright white lights. I woke up in recovery with a morphine button clutched in my hand. I was in recovery 4 hours waiting for an open bed. They finally wheeled me down the hall, in the elevator, down, through a tunnel under the street, another elevator, up, and to my room. I had to scooch over into my bed.
I was getting frantic. They couldn't find J. I couldn't see because he had my glasses. I couldn't reach him on the phone because it was long distance. When he finally made it to my room, I sent him right back out to get my glasses.
I think I dozed off while he was gone.
At some point, J came and sat by me. He asked if I was coherent enough to talk to him and understand what he was saying. He told me that I had NOT had a hysterectomy.
Dr. M had found some lymph nodes that had cancer in them. She also removed my right ovary because it was enlarged and some surrounding lymph nodes for testing.
I was going to need to go through radiation to eliminate the cancer.
It wasn't over. I have treatment to go through. I was drugged enough that I didn't react emotionally.
But rejoice, inasmuch as ye are partakers of Christ's sufferings; that when his glory shall be revealed, ye may be glad also with exceeding joy.
I Peter 4:12-13
So I've skipped some things. Last week, we were in G'ville almost every day.
I went to my consultation with Dr. M on March 12. She was very confident and factual and I felt comfortable with her as my surgeon. We scheduled my surgery for March 18. We went back Tuesday for lab work and a CT scan. I had to drink 32 oz of Gatorade laced with iodine over 1 1/2 hours. Then I had to have an IV. :( They passed me through a donut and the contrast was weird and hot, like sitting on leather interior in the summer. The tech told me I would feel like I had wet myself. {great}
I wish we hadn't gone out for dinner. I woke up very ill at 3 am. I finally threw up at 4:30 and was able to get a little sleep.
Wednesday was my pre-op appointment and also clear liquids day. More lab work. Most of my day was spent in the bathroom. :|
Thursday we got to S----- at 8:30 am. I got called in to anesthesia to get set up. Oxygen, IV, O2 sensor, tummy block. They put me out to give me shots in the stomach.
I barely remember going into surgery - just bright white lights. I woke up in recovery with a morphine button clutched in my hand. I was in recovery 4 hours waiting for an open bed. They finally wheeled me down the hall, in the elevator, down, through a tunnel under the street, another elevator, up, and to my room. I had to scooch over into my bed.
I was getting frantic. They couldn't find J. I couldn't see because he had my glasses. I couldn't reach him on the phone because it was long distance. When he finally made it to my room, I sent him right back out to get my glasses.
I think I dozed off while he was gone.
At some point, J came and sat by me. He asked if I was coherent enough to talk to him and understand what he was saying. He told me that I had NOT had a hysterectomy.
Dr. M had found some lymph nodes that had cancer in them. She also removed my right ovary because it was enlarged and some surrounding lymph nodes for testing.
I was going to need to go through radiation to eliminate the cancer.
It wasn't over. I have treatment to go through. I was drugged enough that I didn't react emotionally.
Thursday, August 26, 2010
March 7, 2010
Another Sunday. Today, I teach my class. The Nobleman who believed Christ could heal his son from long distance. "Just say the word."
Wait on the Lord: be of courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord."
Psalm 27:14
When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.
Isaiah 43:2
Wait on the Lord: be of courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord."
Psalm 27:14
When thou passest through the waters, I will be with thee; and through the rivers, they shall not overflow thee: when thou walkest through the fire, thou shalt not be burned; neither shall the flame kindle upon thee.
Isaiah 43:2
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
March 4, 2010
I have an appointment at S----- on March 12, next Friday. It's hard waiting. My prayers have become praise songs that pop into my head at the right moment. I just thank God for His goodness, for clarity to enjoy every moment with J and the kids.
Monday, August 23, 2010
March 1, 2010
Appointment with Dr. R today. She verified everything we already knew. My cancer is endocervical. I am being referred to Dr. M, head of Gynecological Oncology at S----. I might as well be seen by the best.
Sunday, August 22, 2010
February 28, 2010
"On our way to church. I hope my choice of non-waterproof mascara doesn't prove to be a mistake.
Just holding my daddy's hand."
Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not.
Jeremiah 33:3
Just holding my daddy's hand."
Call unto me, and I will answer thee, and shew thee great and mighty things, which thou knowest not.
Jeremiah 33:3
Saturday, August 21, 2010
February 27, 2010
I will be glad and rejoice in thy mercy: for thou hast considered my trouble;
Psalm 31:7
"Two days ago, I found out I have cancer."
(Probably the scariest first sentence I've ever written, not to mention starting a new journal with it.)
"Two weeks ago, I went in for my annual exam. I mentioned some spotting. I was scheduled to come back for a colposcopy, which included a biopsy of the 'large growth' located on my cervix."
(That 'large growth' turned out to be about 2 cm. NP's need to be very careful how they word things.)
"On that visit (2/19), I was told I would be referred to a gynecologist who may want to do an immediate hysterectomy. Now I know where the word 'hysterics' comes from. That was Thursday. BW and PD had me get a copy of my lab results. Even though I had no appetite, I felt upbeat. Upbeat through all the phone calls, text messages, etc. I called J first, and he surprised me by coming straight home. He said he thought I might need a hug."
(This was just the beginning of what would become a relational revolution for us.)
"Thursday night, I lost it. I started thinking, 'what if'. Exactly two weeks earlier, I was thinking, 'They'll remove the polyp, and I'll take antibiotics for an infection.' Now I was in full-fledged fear for my life. I was letting my imagination run away with me. I called JB. I knew she was the one I needed to talk to. I felt a little better and much calmer after our teary conversation.
That night, I woke up drenched in sweat. Friday, I ran into JR at J2's doctor appointment. Of course we take our kids to the same doctor! I realized my prayer life definitely needed to step it up.
I knew right where my 'God's Promises' book was in my closet. So i went to it constantly during my day.
I got connected with a woman who is friends with NH! She is the first person I've come into contact with that has had exactly what I've been diagnosed with. She has already been through all of this, and I can ask her about anything. I thank God that He brought her along - the friend of a friend! - when I felt no one could help me understand!"
Heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved: for thou art my praise.
Jeremiah 17:14
For I will restore health unto thee, and I will heal thee of thy wounds, saith the Lord;
Jeremiah 30:17
Psalm 31:7
"Two days ago, I found out I have cancer."
(Probably the scariest first sentence I've ever written, not to mention starting a new journal with it.)
"Two weeks ago, I went in for my annual exam. I mentioned some spotting. I was scheduled to come back for a colposcopy, which included a biopsy of the 'large growth' located on my cervix."
(That 'large growth' turned out to be about 2 cm. NP's need to be very careful how they word things.)
"On that visit (2/19), I was told I would be referred to a gynecologist who may want to do an immediate hysterectomy. Now I know where the word 'hysterics' comes from. That was Thursday. BW and PD had me get a copy of my lab results. Even though I had no appetite, I felt upbeat. Upbeat through all the phone calls, text messages, etc. I called J first, and he surprised me by coming straight home. He said he thought I might need a hug."
(This was just the beginning of what would become a relational revolution for us.)
"Thursday night, I lost it. I started thinking, 'what if'. Exactly two weeks earlier, I was thinking, 'They'll remove the polyp, and I'll take antibiotics for an infection.' Now I was in full-fledged fear for my life. I was letting my imagination run away with me. I called JB. I knew she was the one I needed to talk to. I felt a little better and much calmer after our teary conversation.
That night, I woke up drenched in sweat. Friday, I ran into JR at J2's doctor appointment. Of course we take our kids to the same doctor! I realized my prayer life definitely needed to step it up.
I knew right where my 'God's Promises' book was in my closet. So i went to it constantly during my day.
I got connected with a woman who is friends with NH! She is the first person I've come into contact with that has had exactly what I've been diagnosed with. She has already been through all of this, and I can ask her about anything. I thank God that He brought her along - the friend of a friend! - when I felt no one could help me understand!"
Heal me, O Lord, and I shall be healed; save me, and I shall be saved: for thou art my praise.
Jeremiah 17:14
For I will restore health unto thee, and I will heal thee of thy wounds, saith the Lord;
Jeremiah 30:17
Friday, August 20, 2010
Welcome to My Cancer Journey
I write this blog as a way to share, enlighten, and hopefully encourage those who read it.
For my family and friends who were with me physically and spiritually, I share with you some of my feelings and revelations that God led me through as I travelled this road. For those who may be experiencing cervical or pelvic cancers, I share this with you as an encouragement and an "I went through that too!" for you. I hope that you will be blessed as I reflect on this journey from the beginning.
I pray that God's glory will shine through my words.
He calls me precious and beloved,
KT
AKA morninglorykitsch
For my family and friends who were with me physically and spiritually, I share with you some of my feelings and revelations that God led me through as I travelled this road. For those who may be experiencing cervical or pelvic cancers, I share this with you as an encouragement and an "I went through that too!" for you. I hope that you will be blessed as I reflect on this journey from the beginning.
I pray that God's glory will shine through my words.
He calls me precious and beloved,
KT
AKA morninglorykitsch
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